Page created in or before July 2012 (exact date unknown).
Note that only some of the words on this page are actually slurs. Many of the words and phrases on this page are not generally considered slurs, and in fact, may not actually be hurtful, upsetting, retraumatizing, or offensive to many disabled people. They are simply considered ableist (the way that referring to a woman as emotionally fragile is sexist, but not a slur). You're not automatically a bad or evil person/activist if you have used random language on here, but if you have the cognitive/language privilege to adjust your language, it's definitely worthwhile to consider becoming more aware/conscious of how everyday language helps perpetuate ableist ideas and values.
For my most recent perspective on linguistic ableism and the reason that this page exists, see this post: Violence in Language: Circling Back to Linguistic Ableism.
Ableism is not a list of bad words. Language is *one* tool of an oppressive system. Being aware of language -- for those of us who have the privilege of being able to change our language -- can help us understand how pervasive ableism is. Ableism is systematic, institutional devaluing of bodies and minds deemed deviant, abnormal, defective, subhuman, less than. Ableism is *violence.*
This list has been compiled and changed over time with input from many different disabled people, people with disabilities, self-advocates, d/Deaf and hard of hearing people, people with chronic illnesses, sick people, mad people, neurodivergent people, etc. -- and I am always responsive to suggestions from folks who are directly impacted. Also, people in community often disagree about whether a word should be on this list or not, and whether a word on this list is a slur as opposed to a non-slur that is nonetheless ableist in origin or use or both.
This page has receivedtens hundreds of thousands of pageviews since it launched, and has been simultaneously the subject of a number of angry and accusatory comments and letters as well. I never wrote an introduction to this page before, so I'm going to take the time to briefly do so now. The most frequent accusations that I receive in response to this page can fall into three general accusations that I am a) attempting to police everyone's language, b) obsessed with being politically correct, and or c) extremely hypersensitive to imagined insults and slights. I contend that none of these accusations are true.
Language is inherently political. Both as individuals and as larger social and cultural groups, it is self-evident that the language we use to express all sorts of ideas, opinions, and emotions, as well as to describe ourselves and others, is simultaneously reflective of existing attitudes and influential to developing attitudes.
The terms that are listed below are part of an expanding English-language glossary of ableist words and terms. I have chosen to include words or phrases that I know of or that are brought to my attention that meet two criteria: 1) Their literal or historical definition derives from a description of disability, either in general or pertaining to a specific category of disability, and 2) They have been historically and or currently used to marginalize, other, and oppress disabled people.
The rationale for including some of these words may be readily apparent to many visitors as meriting inclusion on this list, such as for "retarded" and "invalid." For others, however, there may be the lingering suspicion that I have opted to be overinclusive and thus, extremely hypersensitive and obsessed with being politically correct. The reason that I have listed words that may not readily come to mind when asked to consider "insults and slurs targeting disability" is precisely because so much of this ableist language is utterly pervasive both in everyday colloquy and formal idiom with hardly any notice or acknowledgement, even by fellow disabled people not using the language as part of any reclamation project. On that note, the list is not intended to condemn or scold disabled people who use any of the words included in the spirit of reclamation or as self-descriptors.
Its primary purpose is to serve as a reference for anyone interested in learning about linguistic microaggressions and everyday, casual ableism. And to the observation that some of the terms offered as alternatives carry analogous meanings, I have stated that the reason some words are included while others are not is because some words have oppressive histories and others do not. For example, the word "dumb" has a disability-specific history (referring to people who cannot speak, and often used to refer to Deaf people), whereas the word "obtuse" does not (deriving from a meaning of "beating against something to make it blunt or dull").
Granted, there will always be folks, disabled or not, who will disagree with the existence, purpose, and or scope of this glossary for a variety of reasons. This brief essay is not intended as a thorough examination of and response to every possible criticism, which would merit an entire series of essays to adequately discuss. My hope is that the glossary will continue to serve as a resource for those interested in its purpose and contents, and that criticisms of this page might now be more nuanced and more informed, given this background and explanation.
+ As a side note, it should be obvious to most readers that political correctness has little, if anything, to do with basic human decency and respect for others, and my primary concern is, in fact, basic human decency and respect for others. Also note that I emphatically insist on referring to myself and my community as autistic, which is assuredly not the politically correct terminology.
++ As another side note, it is my intention to eventually expand the entries on this page to either further explain each term's history and or to link to other pages, such as the Ableist Word Profiles from Forward: Feminists with Disabilities (FWD), that have already done so.
This is a list of ableist words and terms for reference purposes. Some of the entries are slurs, some are descriptions of disabled people or other people with pathologized identities/bodies/experiences, some are slang that derive from ableist origins, and some are common metaphors that rely on disability and ableism. There are also many terms or phrases that are ableist when used together, but are not on this list (like "afflicted with symptoms of [disability]" or "living with physical challenges" or "incapable of managing their behavioral health needs"), because the words taken apart do not have a disability-specific history or current meaning.
This is a living document, constantly growing, expanding, and changing. If I've missed something, please let me know!
One important note: Many people who identify with particular disabilities or disability in general may use descriptors from this list in an act of reclaiming the language. You may well too! BUT if you do not identify with a particular disability/disabled identity, it's probably appropriative to use some of those terms. (Some examples are mad and crip.)
After the list of ableist words and terms, I have included lists of alternatives to ableist slurs, descriptions, and metaphors, if you're interested in unlearning the patterns of linguistic ableism in your own language.
Refers to Blind, low-vision, or sight-limited people. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: willfully ignorant, deliberately ignoring, turning their back on, overcome by prejudice, doubly anonymous, had every reason to know, feigned ignorance
Bonkers
Can refer to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities, if the implication from use is that a person is "like a crazy person."
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Bound to a wheelchair (wheelchair bound)
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Considered ableist because many wheelchair-users experience wheelchairs, and other mobility aids, as liberating, since they enable freedom of movement, rather than confining or restrictive.
Consider instead: uses a wheelchair, wheelchair-user, in a wheelchair, began using a wheelchair, needs or requires a wheelchair, is a full-time wheelchair-user
Burn victim
Refers to people who have survived burns and have visible scars from burns. Not considered offensive by all.
Consider instead: burn survivor, significant scarring from burns
Confined to a wheelchair
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Considered ableist because many wheelchair-users experience wheelchairs, and other mobility aids, as liberating, since they enable freedom of movement, rather than confining or restrictive.
Consider instead: uses a wheelchair, wheelchair-user, in a wheelchair, began using a wheelchair, needs or requires a wheelchair, is a full-time wheelchair-user
Crazy
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Cripple/Crippled (by ____)
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: Frozen by, stopped by, completely stuck, totally halted all operations (if using metaphors); physically disabled person, person with a mobility impairment, paralyzed person (if referring to a disabled person)
Cuckoo
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities, when not used to describe the bird.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Daft
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: dense, ignorant, lacks understanding, impulsive, risk-taker, uninformed, silly, foolish
Deaf-Mute
Refers to Deaf or hard of hearing people.
Consider instead: Deaf person, nonspeaking Deaf person, signing Deaf person, hard of hearing person, DeafBlind person, ASL user, ASL speaker, signer
Deaf to ____ / turn a deaf ear to ____ / etc.
Refers to Deaf or hard of hearing people. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: willfully ignorant, deliberately ignoring, turning their back on, had every reason to know, feigned ignorance
Deranged
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Derp (also herp-derp, der, durr, duh, doy, and variations)
Sounds meant to mock vocalizations that people with intellectual disabilities are stereotyped as making. Some originated, per Oxford English Dictionary, with a 1943 Bugs Bunny cartoon. (h/t Josh Klopfenstein for this information on "duh")
Consider instead: obviously, of course, uh yeah, ummm, ummm uhhh, um yeah, hell yeah, fuck yeah
Diffability
Can refer to any person with a disability, and is usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: disabled person or person with a disability (referring to individuals); disability/ability statuses (referring to an identity/social category)
Differently abled or different abilities
Can refer to any person with a disability, and is usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: disabled person or person with a disability (referring to individuals); disability/ability statuses (referring to an identity/social category)
Dumb
Refers to d/Deaf or hard of hearing people, people with speech-related disabilities, or people with linguistic or communication disorders or disabilities.
Consider instead: dense, ignorant, lacks understanding, impulsive, risk-taker, uninformed, silly, foolish (to replace metaphor); nonspeaking, nonverbal, person with a speech impairment, person with a cognitive disability, Deaf person, hard of hearing person (to refer to a Deaf or disabled person)
Gimp/gimpy
Refers to people with physical and mobility disabilities.
Handicap(ped)BEFORE YOU CONTINUE:
Note that only some of the words on this page are actually slurs. Many of the words and phrases on this page are not generally considered slurs, and in fact, may not actually be hurtful, upsetting, retraumatizing, or offensive to many disabled people. They are simply considered ableist (the way that referring to a woman as emotionally fragile is sexist, but not a slur). You're not automatically a bad or evil person/activist if you have used random language on here, but if you have the cognitive/language privilege to adjust your language, it's definitely worthwhile to consider becoming more aware/conscious of how everyday language helps perpetuate ableist ideas and values.
For my most recent perspective on linguistic ableism and the reason that this page exists, see this post: Violence in Language: Circling Back to Linguistic Ableism.
Ableism is not a list of bad words. Language is *one* tool of an oppressive system. Being aware of language -- for those of us who have the privilege of being able to change our language -- can help us understand how pervasive ableism is. Ableism is systematic, institutional devaluing of bodies and minds deemed deviant, abnormal, defective, subhuman, less than. Ableism is *violence.*
This list has been compiled and changed over time with input from many different disabled people, people with disabilities, self-advocates, d/Deaf and hard of hearing people, people with chronic illnesses, sick people, mad people, neurodivergent people, etc. -- and I am always responsive to suggestions from folks who are directly impacted. Also, people in community often disagree about whether a word should be on this list or not, and whether a word on this list is a slur as opposed to a non-slur that is nonetheless ableist in origin or use or both.
Note from 16 June 2013:
This page has received
Language is inherently political. Both as individuals and as larger social and cultural groups, it is self-evident that the language we use to express all sorts of ideas, opinions, and emotions, as well as to describe ourselves and others, is simultaneously reflective of existing attitudes and influential to developing attitudes.
The terms that are listed below are part of an expanding English-language glossary of ableist words and terms. I have chosen to include words or phrases that I know of or that are brought to my attention that meet two criteria: 1) Their literal or historical definition derives from a description of disability, either in general or pertaining to a specific category of disability, and 2) They have been historically and or currently used to marginalize, other, and oppress disabled people.
The rationale for including some of these words may be readily apparent to many visitors as meriting inclusion on this list, such as for "retarded" and "invalid." For others, however, there may be the lingering suspicion that I have opted to be overinclusive and thus, extremely hypersensitive and obsessed with being politically correct. The reason that I have listed words that may not readily come to mind when asked to consider "insults and slurs targeting disability" is precisely because so much of this ableist language is utterly pervasive both in everyday colloquy and formal idiom with hardly any notice or acknowledgement, even by fellow disabled people not using the language as part of any reclamation project. On that note, the list is not intended to condemn or scold disabled people who use any of the words included in the spirit of reclamation or as self-descriptors.
Its primary purpose is to serve as a reference for anyone interested in learning about linguistic microaggressions and everyday, casual ableism. And to the observation that some of the terms offered as alternatives carry analogous meanings, I have stated that the reason some words are included while others are not is because some words have oppressive histories and others do not. For example, the word "dumb" has a disability-specific history (referring to people who cannot speak, and often used to refer to Deaf people), whereas the word "obtuse" does not (deriving from a meaning of "beating against something to make it blunt or dull").
Granted, there will always be folks, disabled or not, who will disagree with the existence, purpose, and or scope of this glossary for a variety of reasons. This brief essay is not intended as a thorough examination of and response to every possible criticism, which would merit an entire series of essays to adequately discuss. My hope is that the glossary will continue to serve as a resource for those interested in its purpose and contents, and that criticisms of this page might now be more nuanced and more informed, given this background and explanation.
+ As a side note, it should be obvious to most readers that political correctness has little, if anything, to do with basic human decency and respect for others, and my primary concern is, in fact, basic human decency and respect for others. Also note that I emphatically insist on referring to myself and my community as autistic, which is assuredly not the politically correct terminology.
++ As another side note, it is my intention to eventually expand the entries on this page to either further explain each term's history and or to link to other pages, such as the Ableist Word Profiles from Forward: Feminists with Disabilities (FWD), that have already done so.
Glossary of Ableist Phrases
This is a living document, constantly growing, expanding, and changing. If I've missed something, please let me know!
One important note: Many people who identify with particular disabilities or disability in general may use descriptors from this list in an act of reclaiming the language. You may well too! BUT if you do not identify with a particular disability/disabled identity, it's probably appropriative to use some of those terms. (Some examples are mad and crip.)
After the list of ableist words and terms, I have included lists of alternatives to ableist slurs, descriptions, and metaphors, if you're interested in unlearning the patterns of linguistic ableism in your own language.
Generally ableist terms/phrases (some are slurs, some not)
I've listed some alternatives for each phrase, but a longer list of alternatives that can be used for many terms is at the bottom of this page.
Blind to ____ / turn a blind eye to ____ / blinded by ignorance/bigotry/etc. / double-blind reviewRefers to Blind, low-vision, or sight-limited people. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: willfully ignorant, deliberately ignoring, turning their back on, overcome by prejudice, doubly anonymous, had every reason to know, feigned ignorance
Bonkers
Can refer to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities, if the implication from use is that a person is "like a crazy person."
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Bound to a wheelchair (wheelchair bound)
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Considered ableist because many wheelchair-users experience wheelchairs, and other mobility aids, as liberating, since they enable freedom of movement, rather than confining or restrictive.
Consider instead: uses a wheelchair, wheelchair-user, in a wheelchair, began using a wheelchair, needs or requires a wheelchair, is a full-time wheelchair-user
Burn victim
Refers to people who have survived burns and have visible scars from burns. Not considered offensive by all.
Consider instead: burn survivor, significant scarring from burns
Confined to a wheelchair
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Considered ableist because many wheelchair-users experience wheelchairs, and other mobility aids, as liberating, since they enable freedom of movement, rather than confining or restrictive.
Consider instead: uses a wheelchair, wheelchair-user, in a wheelchair, began using a wheelchair, needs or requires a wheelchair, is a full-time wheelchair-user
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Cripple/Crippled (by ____)
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: Frozen by, stopped by, completely stuck, totally halted all operations (if using metaphors); physically disabled person, person with a mobility impairment, paralyzed person (if referring to a disabled person)
Cuckoo
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities, when not used to describe the bird.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: dense, ignorant, lacks understanding, impulsive, risk-taker, uninformed, silly, foolish
Deaf-Mute
Refers to Deaf or hard of hearing people.
Consider instead: Deaf person, nonspeaking Deaf person, signing Deaf person, hard of hearing person, DeafBlind person, ASL user, ASL speaker, signer
Deaf to ____ / turn a deaf ear to ____ / etc.
Refers to Deaf or hard of hearing people. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: willfully ignorant, deliberately ignoring, turning their back on, had every reason to know, feigned ignorance
Deformed / deformity
Refers to people born with absent limbs, disfigurements, or other atypical appearances, or who later have amputations, burn scars, or other changes to their physical appearance that are stigmatized in society. Note that many people do not mind use of the words deformed or deformity, and others find the word disfigurement offensive.
Consider instead: describing the specific condition or appearance
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, scary
Sounds meant to mock vocalizations that people with intellectual disabilities are stereotyped as making. Some originated, per Oxford English Dictionary, with a 1943 Bugs Bunny cartoon. (h/t Josh Klopfenstein for this information on "duh")
Consider instead: obviously, of course, uh yeah, ummm, ummm uhhh, um yeah, hell yeah, fuck yeah
Diffability
Can refer to any person with a disability, and is usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: disabled person or person with a disability (referring to individuals); disability/ability statuses (referring to an identity/social category)
Can refer to any person with a disability, and is usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: disabled person or person with a disability (referring to individuals); disability/ability statuses (referring to an identity/social category)
Refers to d/Deaf or hard of hearing people, people with speech-related disabilities, or people with linguistic or communication disorders or disabilities.
Consider instead: dense, ignorant, lacks understanding, impulsive, risk-taker, uninformed, silly, foolish (to replace metaphor); nonspeaking, nonverbal, person with a speech impairment, person with a cognitive disability, Deaf person, hard of hearing person (to refer to a Deaf or disabled person)
Refers to people with physical and mobility disabilities.
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities, and is usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: Disabled person, physically disabled person, wheelchair-user, person with a disability (to refer to a person); accessible parking, placard parking, disabled-only parking (to refer to designated parking spaces)
Usually refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities, but can also mean any person with a disability.
Consider instead: Disabled person, physically disabled person, wheelchair-user, person with a disability
Refers to people with cleft-lip palate or similar facial deformities/cosmetic disabilities.
Consider instead: cleft lip, cleft palate, cleft lip and palate
Hermaphrodite
Refers to people with intersex conditions, whether or not they were coercively assigned to a particular sex/gender, and whether or not they currently identify with a binary gender.
Consider instead: intersex person or person with intersex condition (if you are referencing a person's genitals or chromosomes); gender non-conforming, gender variant, or genderfluid person (if you are referencing a person's divergence from expectations of gender norms/expression)
Idiot(ic)
Refers to people with intellectual disabilities.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, risky and dangerous, dipshit
Imbecile
Refers to people with intellectual disabilities.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, risky and dangerous, dipshit
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Refers to people with physical or mobility disabilities. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: Boring, uninteresting, monotonous, lacks excitement, uncool, out of fashion (if using metaphors); physically disabled person, person with a mobility impairment, paralyzed person (if referring to a disabled person)
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Low-functioning or high-functioning, level __ autism, mild/severe ___
Refers to disabled people's perceived ability to seem "normal" and not disabled. Often used in the context of autism, psychosocial disabilities (mental illnesses), and addiction-related disabilities. "High-functioning" dehumanizes people by ignoring the ways in which they need support, have challenges/struggles, or experience distress. "Low-functioning" dehumanizes people by ignoring their personhood and capabilities.
Consider instead: Describing the specific characteristics a person has that are relevant to a particular description or context, e.g. "needs help eating and bathing" or "is able to go to college."
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, scary
Refers to an institution housing people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, scary
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, extremely energetic
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Midget
Refers to little people or people with small stature or a form of dwarfism.
Morbidly obese (or just obese)
Refers to fat people/people of size. Note that per many fat activists , it's often completely acceptable to use the word "fat" as a description, so long as it's not used as a pejorative in and of itself.
Consider instead: fat person, person of size
Moron(ic)
Refers to people with intellectual disabilities.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, risky and dangerous, dipshit
Invokes the idea of people who breathe only or mostly through their mouths (instead of their noses) as unintelligent brutes.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, feckless, narrow-minded, dipshit
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, risky and dangerous, dipshit
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, scary
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities. Some people use it specifically to refer to people with antisocial personality disorder or narcissistic personality disorder, or with the quasi-psychiatric categories of psychopathy or sociopathy (these are disputed). Often used metaphorically.
Consider instead: selfish, self-centered, lacks empathy, callous, toxic, manipulative, egotistical, abusive, wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control, scary
Retard(ed)/[anything]-tard (examples: libtard, fucktard, etc.)
Refers to people with intellectual disabilities.
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, feckless, narrow-minded, dipshit
Refers to people with intellectual, learning, or other mental disabilities.
Consider instead: uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, tacky, What were you thinking?, What the hell were you thinking?, What the actual fuck?
Spaz(zed)
Refers to people with cerebral palsy or similar neurological disabilities.
Consider instead: klutzy, clumsy, forgetful, impulsive, reckless
Specially Abled
Can refer to any person with a disability.
Consider instead: Disabled person, person with a disability
Usually refers to people with learning, intellectual, or developmental disabilities, but can mean any person with a disability. Usually a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying "disability" or "disabled."
Consider instead: Disabled person, person with a disability
Refers to people with intellectual disabilities (i.e. "in a stupor").
Consider instead: Uninformed, reckless, impulsive, ignorant, risk-taking, risky and dangerous, dipshit
Refers to people with mental or psychiatric disabilities.
Consider instead: wild, confusing, unpredictable, impulsive, reckless, fearless, lives on the edge, thrill-seeker, risk-taker, out of control
Terms that are not inherently ableist, but become so in context
I've listed some alternatives for each phrase, but a longer list of alternatives that can be used for many terms is at the bottom of this page.
Refers to people with albinism. Most likely ableist when used as a noun by itself (e.g. "she's an albino").
Consider instead: person with albinism, albino person, person who has albinism
Autistic
This is ableist specifically when used as a substitute for "self-centered" or "lacking empathy." It is not ableist if referring to someone who is actually autistic.
Consider instead: selfish, self-centered, lacks empathy, callous, narrow-minded, single-track mind, hyper-focused
Barren
This is ableist when it refers to people who are infertile, carries sexist connotations as well as ableist ones. It is not ableist if discussing agriculture/farming.
Consider instead: infertile, unable to conceive
Bipolar
This is ableist when used as a substitute for "switching very rapidly," "indecisive," or "shifting from one extreme to another" (e.g. "the weather here is so bipolar"). It is not ableist when referring to people who actually have bipolar disorder.
Consider instead: rapidly changes opinions, indecisive, extreme opposites, switching from one extreme to another
Borderline
This is ableist when used to imply a person seems mentally ill because they are unpleasant, toxic, abusive, or manipulative. It is not ableist when referring to people who actually have borderline personality disorder.
Consider instead: unpleasant, toxic, abusive, manipulative, mixed-signals
Deluded / delusional
Refers to people with psychosocial disabilities / mad people / mentally ill people, when experiencing altered states such as hearing voices, having intrusive thoughts, or experiencing paranoia. Often used as a metaphor.
Consider instead: out of touch, totally disconnected, unrealistic expectations, pie-in-the-sky fantasies
Depressed / depressing
Refers to people experiencing various forms of depression. This becomes ableist when not referring to people actually experiencing depression, but merely as a shorthand for sad, upsetting, or disappointing.
Consider instead: sad, upsetting, disappointing, devastating, frustrating, tragic, sad reminder