AUTISTIC HOYA ILLUSTRATED
LYDIA BROWN - 27 APRIL 2012
HOW TO MAKE ARBITRARY AND SCIENTIFICALLY RIDICULOUS CLASSIFICATIONS OR LABELS
1) OBSERVE LARGE GROUP OF PEOPLE.
Six figures standing in a line facing the viewer: (from left to right) a woman with light-colored, wavy hair wearing a long-sleeved shirt and jeans; a man with dark hair and thick goatee wearing a polo shirt and pants; a woman wearing an Islamic hijab (no hair showing) and shalwar kameez; a man with long, curly light-colored hair wearing a hoodie and pants; a woman with dark, Afro-textured hair in a loose hairdo wearing a t-shirt and pants; and a man with dark, curly hair wearing square glasses, a suit, collared shirt, and tie.
2) CALL SOME "LOW FUNCTIONING" AND SOME "HIGH FUNCTIONING."
The same six figures appear in the same left to right order facing the viewer, with the first three on the left-hand side labeled LOW-FUNCTIONING and the last three on the right-hand side labeled HIGH-FUNCTIONING.
3) MAKE UP AN EXCUSE FOR SOMETHING THE FIRST GROUP SEEMS TO SHARE THAT THE SECOND DOESN'T.
Two figures facing each other: a balding man with some hair in a tonsured-like cut, wearing round glasses and a collared shirt and tie, pointing or gesturing with his index finger; a woman with short-cropped dark hair wearing a long-sleeve polo and gesturing with a pen in her hand.
Dialogue between the two figures is as follows:
Man: No one on the left has a jacket!
Woman: The woman on the right doesn't have one though.
Man: Good point. Uh, none of the people on the right have straight hair?
Woman: You don't know what the Muslim's hair looks like, and you never will.